I can blame no one. I asked for nothing. I made no hints as to what I wanted, or what I needed. In fact, I honestly didn’t know. In the 2 months since I left Spain, I had not once thought about what I will need to buy before I return. But post holiday bustle, and as a toast to #2 of my new year’s resolutions, I sat down today and wrote out lists of stuff I have to do. One gigantic horrifically large mofo of a to-do item, is to buy everything I need for Spain. Damn.
As a result, I have concluded where my Christmas presents were lacking and I found some inspiration while scanning, page by page, through my most recently acquired SkyMall. For those of you who don’t know, I have a certain fondness for our airborn shopping magazine. So rather than actually begin the list like I should have, like, for reals, I sat down with my SkyMall and decided I would bitch about things in there that I want, that I never asked for. Logical, right?
Butt-Lifters: Lord knows I don't need this. But I'm buying them as party-favors for all of my friends. Please note how alien and misshapen woman looks in before and how her breasts got larger in the after JUST FROM USING BUT PADS!! Amazing.
Wrist attached, flip out cell phone carrier: A cell phone carrier that stays attached to your wrist? How ingenious. It's like I can't even think of anything to say that does this product justice. This is just. Well. It speaks for itself.
I pray to god that someday, I see someone walking around one the street with one of these on. I could only be so lucky.
Lightbright on bad crack: The only reason I want this is because it's a lightbright with LED lights. I mean, putting LED lights in a lightbright must make it 100K times better, right? I will play with this for MINUTES!
Keychain Money Hider: Ok. So this one isn't a joke. I think this is quite brilliant and probably something us travelers should have. I'm a freak about hiding money all over my person. I have $100 stashed in various places in different bags and pockets all over my pack, purse, daypack and usually some left back in the hostel. I think adding a keychain holder would be good. The only problem, I lose my keys daily and if they had $100 stuffed in them, I think I would have an even bigger problem.